The Port Family Karaoke..

Holla.. Harini maybe last day i'm on MC. Dah 28 hari i all MC. Even MC sepatutnya habis next week on 18hb January, i decide nak masuk opis dah. Sebab comdition coccyx pon dah okay and i dah bosan duduk rumah lama-lama. So hari ni I dental Era keluar la tanpa arah tujuan sebab bosan kat umah. So pikir-pikir da lama jugak kitaorang tak menyumbangkan suara, so decide pergi Red Box IOI Puchong.

Me on my bad hair day!

Sampai je kat IOI Mall Puchong tu, rupanya Red Box dah tutup and digantikan dengan The Port Family Karaouke. Okay so i all nak citer sikit pasal tempat ni. I all suka giler concept dia yang buat ala-ala port construction camtu. Pekerja pun pakai macam orang kat site. I all rasa pagi-pagi keluar rumah nak pergi kerja, dia mesti cakap, "Okay mak. Pergi kerja dulu. Nak pergi site kat Puchong today". Hahahaha. Sejibik macam contractor okay.. So cute and unique. A good concept.

Comel kan? Boleh acah-acah bawak Blueprint and amik gamba. Kunon2 site visit ni..

Harga dia pun memang murah giler. Harga tak masuk akal. Tak sangka semurah ni. Sound system superb. Memang besh. I ngan Era kemain lagi buat konsert kat situ selama 2 jam. Suara dengar sedap nau. Maybe boleh masuk AF tahun ni. Huhuhu. Sound memang besh weh. Tidbits dia unik, keropok goreng. Rasa cam kat Ganu plak. But bila makan keropok ikan goreng tu, gatal la tekak. Susah sikit nak nyanyi. Hehehe. tapi food and drinks from the menu also cheap okay. I all tak try plak sebab baru lepas lunch tadi. So next time i try.

Comel baju staff dia. Comel lagi muka dia. Eh?

Pekerja kat situ sumer friendly. Muda and comel belaka. Sangat la mesra. Terasa macam i ngan Era ni retis datang nak buat sound check kejap. Gila berangan kitaorang. Ramai jugak la time we all datang tu. Bilik for 2, besar sangat. Rasa nak baring jer tanak balik. 

Murah tak tipu. Boleh pegi tiap-tiap hari. Hahaha..

Okay, nak datang lagi sini. Harga murah, servis tiptop, sound sedap. Maybe boleh jadi regular customer pasni. U all, kalo suka karaoke tu, bolehlah datang sini. Dalam IOI Mall Puchong, level atas sekali. Worth every penny. 

It's Okay Not To Be Okay..

All my life, I've struggled with loneliness. I can be with a group of people, yet still feel this strange lonely feeling deep inside. Do you know that feeling when you feel really alone and like no one cares? Why am i so lonely? How do I stop feeling so lonely? This is probably the most common question I've been asked lately. I understand why. Loneliness feels awful.

My life hasn't been easy. My parent get divorced when i'm 13, and I have had a lot of bad days since then. People try to help me feel better, but it doesn't always work. Sometimes I feel completely alone, with no one to talk to. But even in those bad times, I know Allah is there for me. Allah send a lot of good and great people to me. Thank you Allah for all of the blessing, friends and siblings You have gave me. Syukur Ya Allah.

I guess it's normal to get down sometimes. And it's normal to feel like your life is a big mess, especially when something awful happens. That's why Allah wants us to know we can count on Him, even when it seems like the whole world is against us.I try to think that it’s okay to be alone, even it’s been a while, it doesn’t have to make me feel uncomfortable. I don't have to feel bad about being alone because its my choice. Better alone than having a bad company. I try to be my own bestfriend. But deep inside me, i know what i felt. It's okay not to be okay.

What i do? Normally i waste some time on Facebook, Instagram, Wechat, Twitter or playing Candy Crush. Yeahh i've been attached to Candy Crush for the past 2 years i think. And i still can't move on. I'm on level 1290 now. When i'm bored, i will just grab my blanket and sleep. To my future special husband, wherever you are, why are you so far from saving me, so far from the words of my groaning? Rescue me. For my self note, remember, everything will be okay if we love and believe in ourselves, and understand that hope floats around us.. InsyaAllah.

I Wanna Be Fairer..

Nak putih.. nak putih. Barulah putih. Muahahaha. Heyya. Salam satu malaysia. gitew. Hahaha hari ni i all pergi Mines. Jalan-jalan abskan duit. Then pegi la tengok movie kat D'Pulze. I all tengok citer The Forest. Hurmm review sikit eh. Besh la jugak. Tahap ketakutan yang menakutkan. Just ending dia jer tak berapa shiok. Its about a twin, Jess and Sara. Sara need to save her twin from the forest, Aokigahara Forest. So sepanjang citer tu pasal Sara try to save her twin. That forest known as a haunted forest where people go to commit suicide. So as an identical twin, Sara know that Jess tak mati lagi. She got that feeling la mengatakan Jess dalam kesusahan. If my sister wandered into a haunted forest because she wanted to be alone or something like that, well let’s just say I’d probably just let her go. Why double down on a mistake when it comes to ghosts and the idea that I might be dead inside the forest. Pergilah minta renjer hutan cari. Betul tak?

But actually, it based on a true event. Aokigahara forest is very real, and the events of the film more or less accurately depict what the forest is like. Memang kisah ni betul, kisah orang bunuh diri, "ubasute" and macam-macam lah. U all google la pasal forest ni eh. I all malas nak citer panjang. Hahaha. I all sedih sebab Aideen mati kene bunuh gara-gara perasaan melampau si Sara tu. Dah la Aiden tu handsome. Berduka mama. By the way, u can google "Aokigahara Forest Bodies". Beratus gambar bodies that they found in that forest. What a spooky forest. Banyak "yudei".

Okay abis movie tu i all pegi la cari kedai nak beli produk memutihkan kulit. Dah bermacam produk i try tapi tak jugak putih. Radiglow, K-Colly, Inayah Advance, Glutacaps, Injection Vit C, Glutathione la ape la, u name it, mostly i dah try. Tapi tetap gini jugak kaler kulit i. I takdela skin problem sangat, kekadang tu adalah jerawat tapi problem i is my big pores. And also my dark skin. Hehehe. Not that dark just cekelat-cekelat camtu. Tapi biasalah kan, kita mana pernah puas and bersyukur dengan apa yang kita ada. Macam hosmet i, dah putih gebu pon gigih nak makan collagen putihkan kulit. Seriously i don't understand her. Hahaha.

So hari ni i terpengaruh la beli set penjagaan muka Qu Puteh dengan Secret Skin White Kawaii Jihan Musa pakai tu. Nak try la tengok camne. Sambil tu i akan teruskan makan Vit C, Vit E and Transcap ni. Kalau tak putih jugak, siap Dato Seri Vida ngan Jihan. Haha see i mudah terpengaruh kan? Actually i tak percaya sangat kalau produk pakai retis jadi duta sebab dorang banyak duit so macam-macam treatment dorang leh buat. Contohnya Kajol tu. Hehehe. Tapi takpe i try okay.

So i harap i rajin la nak consume semua bende alah ni. Sebab i bukan rajin sangat. And part nak kena minum 3 liter air tu, perghh cabaran yang cukup besar. Rela masuk air IV macam kat spital dari nak telan masuk tekak. Tapi, demi mendapatkan kulit yang cantik and putih, i akan berusaha. Beauty is pain right? Okay. Go Zett go. Jangan hot hot chicken shit. Hahahaha. Okay till then, tata titi titu. Muahciked.

Cara Mengundang Hantu..

Perghhh ape ke scary nau entry i kali ni. Hahaha. Takdelah, sebenarnya baru je abis layan recorded movie kat tv. Selama 20 hari mc ni da berpuluh movie aku layan. Yelah bosan kan duduk kat rumah. So malam ni aku layan satu movie melayu tajuknya "Cara Mengundang Hantu". Yang aku kenal berlakon dalam movie tu Imuda, Ruminah Sidek and Allahyarham Mariani je. Yang lain semua tak kenal. Pelakon biasa-biasa je. Budget murah kot.

Okay aku nak citer sikit la pasal apa yang aku tengok tadi. Terpulanglah u all nak baca ke tak, masing-masing ada pendapat sendiri pasal hantu ni. Ade yang percaya ada pulak yang tak. Aku? Hurmm kalau tak percaya kang dia datang pulak. So aku percaya lah.. Hahahaha..

Okay dalam movie ni ade 4 short story yang boleh mengundang hantu katanya. So jom i citer sikit eh.

Terkacau Pokok Pisang
Dalam citer ni, Rizal tu terletak parang kat pokok pisang. Pastu dia kena kacau dengan pompuan jadian muka macam wife dia sedangkan wife dia pegi kelas menjahit. Dari tengahari jadian pokok pisang tu dengan Rizal. Malam wife dia balik dari kelas menjahit baru Rizal sedar. Gitew.

Okay aku memang pernah dengar pasal pokok pisang ni keras sikit. Kata orang tua-tua, pokok pisang (yang serumpun) tempat tinggal kesukaan bagi ponti and pocong. Selain tu, antara pokok lain yang orang kata berhantu adalah pokok ara, pokok beringin, pokok sukun, pokok kekabu, pokok ciku, pokok saga, pokok asam jawa, pokok buluh, pokok bacang dan pokok nangka.Elakkan berteduh atau bermain di waktu senja dekat pokok-pokok ni. Sebab kata orang tua-tua, time tu lah mereka berkeliaran di pokok sampai la ke subuh. Wallahulam.

Menderhaka Pada Orang Tua
Citer tentang Ruminah Sidek pulak. Anak dia curi duit haji dia. Pastu bertengkar. Pastu anak dia halau Ruminah Sidek keluar dari rumah. Sepanjang cerita ni Ruminah Sidek berkeliaran la kat luar. Last-last rupanya dia dah mati lama. So hantu dia lah merayau. Sampai anak dia accident. So anak dia mati sebab hantu mak dia kacau Imuda.

Dalam kisah ni, jangan kencing merata-rata. Terutamanya lelaki. Imuda tu suka kencing merata tepi jalan tak minta izin. Ruminah Sidek yang hantu tu marah cakap kurang ajar. Tu tempat dia. Awas ye kalau lelaki-lelaki tu nak kencing. Pegi cari public toilet kat Petrol Station. Free je pun!

Tak Berperikemanusiaan
Haa yang ni pelakon cina. Mak ngan anak dia. Anak dia model. Terlanggar sorang perempuan melintas jalan sambil pegang payung. Dia tak bagitau sesapa dia langgar lari perempuan tu. So mak dia asyik kena kacau je. Ada orang ketuk pintu, bukak pintu ada payung berlumuran darah. Kerusi asyik beralih, tv on sendiri. Last-last anak dia pun kena kacau baru dia bagitau mak dia.

Mak dia ade pesan masa scene anak dia tak cuci mekap terus tido. Mak dia kata, kalau tido dengan mekap, nanti benda kotor ganggu. Aku tak sure ni memang kata-kata orang tua ke? Aku ni selalu tido tak cuci mekap. 1st time aku tau pasal benda ni. And satu lagi, sentiasalah masuk rumah dengan kaki kanan. Kalau masuk kaki kiri, hantu pun ikut masuk.

Tidak Mempercayai Alam Ghaib
Haa yang ni sebenarnya aku lupa tajuk dia. Hahaha. Tapi citer pasal 3 orang perempuan yang tinggal serumah. Multi-cultural. Sorang melayu nama Puteri Susan, sorang cina nama Elaine and sorang India nama Suti. Puteri tu selalu cakap kat housemate dia jangan menyanyi atau menari dalam rumah tengah-tengah malam. Tapi Suti dan Elaine ni tak percaya. Selalu gelakkan Puteri. Rumah yang dorang duduk tu ada kes bunuh diri. Dulu ada tukang cuci India dengan anak dia kerja situ. Anak dia nak sangat masuk Universiti jadi doctor sebab nak bantu mak dia. Tapi walaupun STPM dapat 4A, dia tak diterima masuk. So dia pun terjun lah dari apartment tempat dia dengan mak dia kerja tu. Mak dia pulak, bila anak dia bunuh diri, dia pun bunuh diri dengan mengelar leher dia sendiri. Mati jugak walaupun ade beberapa titik je darah kat pisau. Huhuhu..

Then, kisah ni ada bagitau, kalau tengah malam jangan tapau makanan yang berunsurkan daging. Nanti hantu ikut balik rumah. Suti yang cakap, so maybe kata orang tua-tua kaum India kot.

So, aku nak share jugaklah antara kata-katan orang tua pasal benda-benda yang tak elok dibuat yang boleh mengundang hantu. Rasionalnya, tak tau lah. Mungkin ada sebab kot orang tua cakap camni. Maybe nak takutkan anak-anak je dulu :

Tidak Boleh Terkena Hujan Panas, Nanti ‘Keteguran’ atau ‘Tersampuk’
Kata orang-orang tua, setiap datang hujan panas, ada hantu yang berkeliaran.Hujan panas seringkali turun dalam keadaan yang tidak disangka-sangka. Seringkali hujan akan turun tiba-tiba di saat cuaca panas terik yang menggigit. Menurut kepercayaan orang tua-tua, hujan panas yang turun membawa alamat bahawa suatu perkara yang tidak diingini akan berlaku.

Tapi aku ade kisah dekat opis aku. Putrajaya kan, keliling tasik. Opis aku betul-betul di core island. So ramai kawan opis aku cakap, setiap kali buat rondaan masa hujan renyai waktu senja, mesti nampak satu family ni duk bertenggek atas pagar. Kalo tak hujan renyai, takde.

Jangan Main Spirit of The Coins
Hahaha. Ni banyak aku tengok movie kalau main je sah-sah mengundang hantu. Dulu kat sekolah ada kawan aku kata pernah main. Tatau lah ye ke tak. Sebab aku takde pun kat tempat kejadian. Aku ingat lagi, masa kat umah di JB, aku layan dvd movie ni lah. Masa tu 5,6 tahun lepas. Movie Thailand kalo tak salah. Aku tengok sorang-sorang lewat malam sebab mak and adik aku da tido. Habis je movie, aku pun pergila masuk bilik and tekan suis nak on lampu. Lampu tak menyala oii. Terus aku menjerit pegi bilik mak aku. So, jangan kata main, tengok movie dia pun aku tanak dah.

So percaya ke tidak? Dalam Islam, hantu seperti mana yang dipercayai oleh kita tu sama sekali tak wujud. Sebaliknya, daripada  al-Qur'an dan al-Sunnah didapati apa yang diperkatakan oleh kita tu takde kena mengena langsung dengan roh orang mati sebaliknya ia adalah Iblis, jin dan syaitan. Malah, mempercayai kewujudan Iblis, jin dan syaitan termasuk dalam rukun Iman yang wajib diimani. Ini kerana kewujudan Iblis, jin dan syaitan disebut secara jelas di dalam al-Qur'an dan al-Sunnah walaupun manusia tidak dapat melihatnya. Ini bermakna mempercayai kewujudan kedua-duanya termasuk dalam beriman kepada Allah, Kitab dan Rasul. Firman Allah SWT dalam surah al-Zariyat ayat 56: “Dan (ingatlah) Aku tidak menciptakan jin dan manusia melainkan untuk mereka menyembah dan beribadat kepada-Ku”.

Second Chance?

Yes and No. Huhuhu.. Oh, we all have that.Just reality dictates that you can't so you sometimes dream a little. Fantasy won't hurt anybody i guess. So here is who i wanna meet again and who i don't.

A big yes to my crush, someone who i adore so much. How i wish i could turn back times and treat him good so that he won't leave me. I know he loves me but i tak pernah menghargai dia. Yup, i never appreciate him until he's gone. Our relationship is like a roller coaster ride that time. But i do loves him. And he didn't know that. I still remember all of our conversations, memories taht we shared, and the phone call when he's out of town for work. We're separated by thousand miles and i didn't make the relationship spark at all. I am 24 that time. Both of us. If I had the chance to go back and meet him for the first time again, I would put extra effort in keeping him.  I want to get to know him all over again or make up for the things i have done wrong. I want to display the best side of me. And now, he's married with 2 kids already.

A yes to the day i met Era. I would told her not to call me "Kak". So that she won't. But now we are used to it. So i don't mind. It's not that i don't like to be called that way, but she is one of the biggest influences people in my life. A lot of her friends, become mine too. And when she called me kak, the whole bunch of the group will call me the same.She will also introduce me with "Kak Zett". Even some of them are only 1-2 years younger than me. I don't wanna sound that old. And that's odd. Hahahah..

Yes to the day i met Dato Seri Vida. I met her on Makan Malam Sempena Hari Wanita Peringkat Kebangsaan 2015. I should've ask her, her email address. So that i can send my resume. Hahaha. She's my idol now. An example of a strong and successful woman i would like to be one day. InsyaAllah.

A yes to my ex, MABP. My ex when i'm 22 years old.  I would have turned around and run as fast as I could. I've regret to know him. He caused a lot of problem which i can still feel the pain until now. Like using my name for loans, which he dissapear and i have to pay. To sell my car without proper agreement so that the car is still on my name and i have to pay for 7 years even i'm not using it. I really hate him and i don't wanna see his face anymore. Don't you dare to show your face to me.

So many people will leave scars in your heart. And there will be the one who will always put a smile whenever you're thinking of them right? Sometimes things just get out of hand. I just wanna go back and meet all of the person all over again and so i can wipe the old slate clean and start all over again. And this time make it better.  I wish we really do have time machine... but I guess that's not going to happen. Hahaha. So let's do our best today and forget what happen! Oops.. I mean learn from it too!

Fall in Love With Kajol..

Yeayy last night dapat tengok dah Dilwale setelah lama nak pergi. So, I, Afiq, Naza, Epul and Faizal pegilah tengok kat IOI Mall Putrajaya. Our show at 11.50pm. Kemain ramai orang. Beratur almost 30 minutes pun tak dapat beli popcorn. Sakitnya hati.

Okay, i bukan nak cerita pasal Dilwale sangat pun. Memang best la this movie. I'm not a Bollywood Movie lover, but cerita ni best. Kelakar ada, sedih ada, so berbaloi la tengok. 2.5 hours dalam panggung tu aku dah tak senang duduk sebab sakit. Ikut hati nak je berdiri tepi dinding, tapi kang satu panggung tu tengok i pulak. So i tahan jelah.

Sepanjang movie tu, mulut ni tak berhenti cakap "lawanya Kajol"... Yes, there's no scene pun yang dia tak lawa. Not even one! How she can be so pretty? I can see she's maybe 2 or 3 shades fairer than before. So i googled to know what is her beauty secret. Some reports said taht she's undergo a skin melanine surgery, skin whitening treatment and what so on. No wonder she's drastically changes. If i have a lots of money, i sure will undergo the same treatment. Because i've always wanted to have a fairer skin. Hurmm. I want to have a snow-white skin.

See, dulu-dulu takdelah putih sangat. Dark skin and chubby. But she's pretty. She has an unique beauty. I love her eyes.

And now, she's prettier than before. Ohmaigad. I adore her. What a big change. I maybe don't have enough money to go for the skin whitening surgery or treatment. I've take a lots of whitening product. Radiglow, Collagen, Vitamin C, Vitamin E, Dolly Collagen, but tak putih-putih pun. I've also inject some product pun tak putih jugak. I wanna try with SKin Bleaching pulak la pasni. Mana tau boleh putih sikit.

SRK pon makin tua makin handsome. His body, fuhhh macam orang muda. I dah cakap kat Naza and Afiq untuk buat that kind of body. Because both of them hari-hari pergi CF buat badan untuk Bali. Hahaha. Okay kalau Afiq and Naza ada badan macam SRK, i pun nak putih and kurus macam Kajol.

Azam tahun baru, nak putih nak putih barulah putih. Muahhh. Hahahahah *gelak Dato' Seri Vida...

Roadtrip To Kuala Selangor..

Hey all. What do u do on 1st January? I can see a lot of people posting their vacation to beaches and whatsoever. Ramai yang take advantage of this long holiday to go somewhere. To spend their time with their beloved families and friends. So do i. Me and my beloved buddies which is Era, Naza, Epul and Afiq decided to take a roadtrip to Kuala Selangor. Actually the idea is to go to Ipoh, but considering some factor such as my medical conditions, the car problems, and what so on, so we decided to head to Kuala Selangor. This is Epul's hometown so he will be the tour guide. And Afiq also doing some research about Kuala Selangor. The top attraction that we should visit.

We started our journey at 6.15am after Subuh. This is because Afiq wanna have breakfast by the paddy field. I and Era tak tido actually since last night. Imsomnia. Hahaha. So the journey takes about 1.5 hours and we reach Kuala Selangor by 8am. Just nice for a kampung style breakfast.

The nasi lemak there is soooo fucking delicious. And ada satu kuih tu. Berbungkus dalam daun pisang. I used to eat Pulut Serunding Kelapa, but this one Pulut with Sambal Tumis inside. Pedas and sedap. After breakfast, Epul drive bawak masuk ke kawasan paddy field. Ohmaigad. Memang cantik. What a breathtaking view. Jakun kejap kitaorang berhenti and pegang-pegang padi tu. Comel. Hijau. Hehehehe..

Tengoklah. Subhanallah cantiknya ciptaan Allah kan. Padi yang hijau. Langit yang biru. Rasa macam nak baring atas padi tu. Hahaha.. So we stop there taking pictures and enjoy the panaromic view.

Then kami teruskan perjalanan. Ada lalu kat satu Paddy Gallery. Niat nak masuk. Then EPul, Naza and Afiq turun siasat. Then they said its not worth it. As kami akan duduk atas deck untuk tengok. Tak boleh masuk dalam pun. So we decided not to go. Seterusnya kami ke Bukit Malawati. Bayaran tiket RM5.30 termasuk GST. Dari bawah we hop on a trem to go uphill. So we can see la a lot of museum here. Ada Musuem Permainan Tradisional, Museum Sejarah, Lighthouse, Poisoned Well, Cannons, Hundred Steps and banyak lah lagi. Tapi tak larat nak jalan. Hahaha. Sakit tailbone aku jalan. Dalam kereta pun dah cramped.

Monkeys are everywhere. Belum masuk ngan kawan-kawan aku yang perangai pun macam monkeys. hahaha. Sakit perut bergelak masa kat dalam Muzium Sejarah. Ada je lawak dorang yang buat kami ketawa. Lupa pulak dalam muzium, so ketawa kuat-kuat. Aduii. Then we all ambik-ambik gambar berlatar belakang kan Selat Melaka. Sambil menahan bau air kencing monyet yang sangat kuat kat situ. Aku dan Era rasa insecure takut kena terkam dengan monkeys. Belum part maruku Afiq kena rampas oleh monkey-monkey tu. Kesian Afiq. Habis sepeket maruku dia. Hahaha..

Then trem bawak turun downhill ke Muzium Ikan Air Tawar. Kitaorang dah berpeluh so tak turun pun. Sebab muzium dia yang hado. Tak menarik. After Bukit Malawati kami ke Pasar Penambang. Banyak lah kedai-kedai yang jual produk makanan laut ala-ala kat Pangkor tu. Ada banyak jugak seafood restaurant kat sini.

After that, kami ke Cendol Borhan. Rata-rata bloggers recommend untuk datang sini. So kami pun enjoy la makan cendol durian dengan cuaca panas terik. Bagusnya semua pekerja berkopiah. And ramai jugak masa we all datang tu. Cendol dia memang sedap weh. Murah dan sedap.

Lepas makan cendol kitaorang jalan-jalan tengok kain langsir la, kain ela lah. Pastu dah tatau nak buat apa. Afiq pun beli movie ticket Dilwale malam ni at 11.50pm di IOI Mall. So tak sempat la nak tengok fireflies. Kami pun bergerak la balik ke Cyberjaya.

On the way balek, makan dulu dekat Restoran Gelas Besar ke ape ntah nama dia di TTDI. Then balik rumah. Sakit gila punggung aku. Kebas dalam kereta lama-lama. So balek tido dulu. Malam nanti nak tengok Dilwale.

Hahaha.. So that is our activities on the first day of twenty sixteen. I really enjoy the trip. To be with your best buddies ( even tak semua dapat join ), its really a good journey.

A Hell Of A Woman..

Hi all, happy new year.. Its a new day. A new chapter anyway.. On top of all, i feel so sad and empty.. I don’t know why? Life has been so harsh on me lately. Last nite, i’ve been wondering, is this what we called karma? For those bad things i’ve done.. Maybe this is a punishment to me! What goes around will come back around. So i guess this is my payback time..

Empty.. It’s feel like i’m standing in this big world, alone. With nobody by my side.. Nobody to watch my back. Why does life need to hurt me so much?

I often find myself down with hatred and anger..Outburst of rage.. I've try to leave all of the shit behind, but whenever i try to, it keep pulling my leg back into the sluts.

I am so full of anger and hatred till i can't see straight. I really have no control over it any longer. Its partly due to being trapped in a really sucky situation. I can’t see my way out of which caused me to feel so bad. What a pure, blinding rage.

Can i still create peace in my heart? Or can i turn to be a heartless one?

Hello Twenty Sixteen..

2016 is just around the corner. I mean yeahh tonight is the new year eve. I wanna talk about my new year resolutions. I make a New Year's resolution every year.Every year, i make the same promises, and every year i failed miserably. Huhuhu. The hardest resolution that i promise myself is to lose weight. But i kept gaining kgs every year. *crying..

I wanna take a moment to look back on what achievement i've unlock on 2015.

1. I was being promoted twice. Promoted to Manager of Sales & Marketing on April and being promoted again as Director of Sales on July. Alhamdulillah. Rezeki Allah. Rezeki anak-anak. Anak-anak belum lahir sebab belum ade calon suami. Tapi mummy buat ni semua untuk anak-anak mummy. Giteww berangan!

2. My relationship with my family is getting better. I was so busy all the time that i have neglect my family. Alhamdulillah, now my relationship with my parent and sibling dah bertambah baik. Dah balik kampung tunjuk muka. I know both of my parent, and my siblings frustrated with me. I've choose to love my carrier than my family. I can't forgive myself for being so selfish.

3. Travel more. Yes i've been to New Delhi, Mumbai, Kolkata, Chennai, Hyderabad, Bangladesh, Beijing, Singapore, Jakarta, Boracay this year. Syukur alhamdulillah. Merasa la tengok negara orang.

4. Settle hutang lapuk. Gitew kata kau. Yeah i've started my 2015 with a lot of debt, around RM20,000 maybe. Credit card, personal loan, car loan ,etc. I've 5 debt, and towards the end of 2015, i only have 1 left. Alhamdulillah. Around RM 4000++ to settle insyaAllah.

And what was the things i've failed to unlock on 2015?

1. Getting married. Urghh jangan kata married, boyfriend pun takde till now. Being attached with 1,2 or 3 or 4 guys this year, hahaha. But it last not more than 3 month. Im so unlucky in love maybe.

2. To lose weight. Oh my Gucci. This is the hardest to achieve. This is what i carried forward every year. Maybe since 2010?

Thank you Allah for all of the blessing. Bersyukur sangat di atas rezekiMu. Sesungguhnya Allah maha mengetahui segala sesuatu.

So what are my 2016 resolutions?

1. LOSE WEIGHT again. Hahaha. Okay, let's put a target now. I want to get rid 20Kgs of my fat on 2016.

2. Settle my debt.

3. Get a boyfriend which i wanna spend my whole life with.

4. Be a good daughter to my parent and a good sister to my siblings.

5. Pray more. Menuju ke syurga Allah. Jauh sangat aku dari jalan Allah.

6. Sedekah lebih banyak.

7. Buy a new phone. Self reward ler sikit. Hehehe. Syyhh diam-diam. Kang handphone skang buat hal plak.

8. Travel moreee... I wish to visit Boracay again. Wish to travel to more beaches on 2016.

9. Urmm.. I want to pet a fish.

Thats all. I hope i can unlock all by end of 2016. Insyallah. Semoga Allah permudahkan urusanku. Amiin amiin ya rabbal alamin.

Ni Hau Ma, Beijing..

I've been to Beijing, China from 10-17 April 2015. Its been almost six month after my trip, so i pon tak ingat sangat about the city. Maybe because i don't fall in love with Beijing. Wa pu ai ni Beijing. Hahaha. But, let me write what i remember okay..

I think its hard to communicate here as the Chinese people here can't understand English. I had a very hard time since my arrival until the last day there. Being cheated by a taxi drivers for 3 times, left by the roadside, super cold rain during my walk, sand storm after a decade is happening a lot of bad experience.

I stay at Beijing Prime Hotel in Wangfujing district. This hotel is a very big hotel here and quite safe. If you are woman, and travelling alone or with woman as well, you may consider to stay here. The price is CNY 3,700 for 7D 6N. The hotel is so clean. This is my first time in China. They do sell stuff in the room. From the food, to the toilettries. And also Chinese medicine. Hehehe...

So as the hotel is in Wangfujin area, i sempat la jalan-jalan kat situ. This place known as the best shopping area in Beijing. Ala-ala Oxford Street kat London.

I went to the Ming Tombs as part of a day tour to the Great Wall and it was well worth a visit. We found it useful to go with a guide who could explain the history and significance as I don't know how much you would understand otherwise. So we take a tour from our hotel. It cost us CNY 200 per person.

The place is very peaceful to walk around and you can feel the history that surrounds the sights, Going down into the tombs underground was very exciting and we thoroughly enjoyed it. Would recommend this attraction as part of a day tour. Our tour guide name is Angel. She is soooo funneh. Hehehe. And she speak broken English all the time. Dalam group from my hotel ada lebih kurang 9 pax. So naik coach untuk tour. Helok-helok matsaleh dalam couch tu. Bergetar tulang rusuk i. Hahahaha.. There is one ritual before u left The Ming Tomb. Sebelum keluar gate kena hentak kaki, sapu-sapu baju and badan and sebut " Wo Hu Lai Le". Tour guide kata supaya roh-roh jahat tak ikut kita balek. So berdekak-dekak i ngan abam mat saleh hentak-hentak kaki sambil cakap Cina.

You are not a man until you climb the Great Wall of China..

This is a very popular Chinese proverb in Chinese culture. I didn’t hear about it until I had visited the Great Wall, but it seems that climbing the Great Wall is something of a rite of passage. After I put the pictures up on Facebook, all my Chinese friends would mention my pictures and that I must be a man now that I have climbed the Great Wall. But man? Hahaha.. Im a woman. Janganlah jadi pengkid pulak nanti.

The wall itself was spectacular. The sheer magnitude of the wall is amazing. I going up by sliding car and go down by the sliding car also. I would like to take the cable car but the weather is quite bad and they stop the cable car operation. Nak panjat pakai kaki, uhhh tak mampu i. So, I only climbed a small portion of the wall, but it made me realize just how large such a project would have been. Especially such a long time ago, the wall could only have been finished with a huge amount of labor by the Chinese people. Also, you never realize how much you appreciate steps that are all the same size and even until you encounter some steps that are not. The steps up the Great Wall of China were as huge as the itself and often took (for someone short and rendang tak berbuah like me) a full extension of the leg in order to reach some of the steps.

If you ramble along Wangfujing Street in the evening during your Beijing Travel, it is advisable to visit its neighbouring Wangfujing Night Food Street. Tempat ni dekat je ngan my hotel. So jalan kaki je dalam 5 minutes. Ade sekali tu hujan plak masa nak balek. Dah la sejuk, hujan plak buat muka i kebas lari-lari anak balek hotel. Actually Wangfujing Night Food Street is formally called “Donghuamen Night Food Street, which is located on Donganmen Street linked to the west of the crossroad at the northern tip of Wangfujing Pedestrian Street.

Wangfujing Night Snack Street is often called by tourists while Donghuamen Night Snack Street by the local residents in Beijing. They both refer to the same night food market in Wangfujing area.This 100-meter long snack street is open from 6:00pm to 9:00pm every day. The night market is home to about 100 stalls selling over 100 snacks from all over China.

For adventurous dinners, it is a food paradise with such unique snacks as centipedes, lizards, deep fried crickets , starfish and a lot more available to eat on a stick. I am a muslim so that i cant take the exotic snacks and go for octopus only. Hahaha. But guys, its something that you can look forward when you're in Beijing. Im so sad to see the starfish, lizards on a stick to be eat.. Hurmm..

Also masa kat sana, berlakunya sand storm. Ribut pasir selepas berdekad tak jadi di Beijing. Memang scary. Sayangnya i dah delete pulak gambar-gambar tu. Memang kuning and tak nampak pape. So i duk rest je dalam bilik 2 hari. Rugi-rugi. Takde plak number telephone Shila Amzah, kalo tak boleh jugak lepak makan starfish dengan dia. Bosan kot.. Hahahaha..

Tapi sempat jugaklah pegi shopping-shopping kat Silk Market. Bapak besar tempat dia. Nasib baik Nudinmi ada. Dapatlah rega murah uols.. I just cakap Si Sie Ni je masa last urusniaga. Hahaha! So its time to go back home. I'm coming home.. Coming home.. tell the world that i coming home!

But i do enjoy the trips. China, wo hui lai le!

Transition Of To Hide Or Not To Hide..

Welcome to my new blog guys. Actually this is my 3rd blog. I've started blogging since 2009 with one secret blog which i call Secret Diaries Of Mine. That blog, dollsofthedown.blogspot.com is a private blog which i write a lot of my life's secret. Yeah i love to write. I feel its hard for me to voice out and tell what i feel inside. So there is where i let my anger, frustration and happiness flows!

Secondly, on 2013 i have a wordpress account which i made private as well. Yeah i guess its hard to write something and let the whole world read it. But what is the point of doing that? I guess life is a big experience which we should shared. To learn from others mistakes. To gain knowledge from all of the people out there..

I may not have many to offers. But i do feel, maybe somewhere, someone will be inspired by me. Or will shared the same thought of how i see this world. And i think its time for me to stand out, not hiding behind my keyboard anymore. Oh well, i'm not a keyboard warrior guys. Don't expect much from me huh!

However i will try to share some post from my old blogs here. And will let u see, the world through my perspective. Happy scrolling. Happy reading.  Revealing what behind the curtains of a single, plump, 31 years old woman, happy but not so happy me! I loves travelling, cooking, reading, singing, and watching movie. Probably i will write about all of my passions in this blog. Anything else to know about me? Well for me to know and for you to find out.

Muahciked ..